Chewing Words

noun. verb. adjective. adverb…they're all tasty in my book

Devil Inside

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What a Lucky Devil

My life sounds like pure high-strung crap at the moment, so I made myself have a little fun at the expense of moi-self. Christmas-time was less fun for me this year than usual, for all the reasons already hashed out elsewhere. But there are those moments that come high-jinxing in and you’d best have the good sense to appreciate them, otherwise you miss the whole point. The whole point being everything isn’t always so flippin’ serious.

I am notorious for being behind the camera and not in front of it. My daughter, however, has figured out how to take pictures with my Palm, and insists we do so frequently. So when Luckito El Gato began wreaking havoc with Ein Tannenbaum and mama was running around like a lunatic with Babes’ princess crown on her head and a water spray bottle chasing the cat, Babes thought picture taking was in order. So, I’ve created a bit of poesy (borrowing heavily from Clement Clarke Moore’s classic) that will hopefully give an idea of what a grand time was had Christmas Eve with mama a pneumonic mess, the cat with the Devil inside, and a 3 and a half year old who could appreciate the jolly, rolling time.

‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house,
Was coughing and flu, mama starting to grouse;
Old holey, slippers on the footies with care,
In the hopes that Santa would bring a new pair.
The Babes was nestled with mom and well-fed,
While visions of Bratz Girls danced in her head.
Mama in Babes’ crown and her old, peely sweater
Kept silently wishing she’d start feeling better.
When from under the tree there arose such a clatter
We sprang from the armchair to see what was the matter!
Away to the tree I flew in a flash
Bent over to see what had caused such a crash.
The white lights twinkled like stars from above
And gave lustre of mid-day to see the cat that we love
All tangled in decor, his whiskers aquiver,
I roared and harumphed, I wanted his liver!
I knew in a moment Luckito’d be dead
If didn’t calm down and start using my head.
More rapid than eagles the thought did arise
To spray him with water, a squirt in the eyes.
“Now kitty, you bad boy, now get out of there!
On Gato, on spazzo, I’ll get you, beware!

To the top of the stairs you’d better not run
Now dash away, dash away, be done with your fun!”

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,
So around the house that kitty was chased,
Streaming gold beads and tinsel, his fur was so laced.
And then in a twinkling I heard right beside me
Babes prancing and pawing, excited and happy
To see so much fun for mama and kitty
So festive, don’t stop, it’d be such a pity!
A squirt from the bottle held in mama’s right hand
On Gato’s orange head did decidedly land.
Babes’ eyes, how they twinkled! Her dimples, how merry!
Her cheeks were like roses, her nose like a cherry!
Her droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And the grin on her face showed teeth like white snow;
The phone that she held in her palm like a gun
Began flashing off light like rays of the sun.
She had a cute face and a little round belly,
That shook, when she laughed like a bowlful of jelly.
She was chubby and plump, a right jolly small elf,
And I laughed when I saw her, in spite of myself;
A wink of her eye and a twist of her head,
Soon gave me to know the pictures I’d dread.
She shrieked and she laughed and went straight to work
And took lots of photos, I felt like a jerk.
The kitty sat preening himself on the floor,
Daintily picking around the decor.
Babes sprang here and there, pleased all around
Managing to get mama to calm down.
And I heard her exclaim as peace did restore,
“Christmas is fun when the tree’s on the floor!”

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Written by cr8df8

December 29, 2010 at 3:58 pm

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